Why sheep are terrifying: 7

They pretend to be sheepskin rugs and lie on the floor watching your television for free..

Why sheep are terrifying: 6

They experiment behind the barns and breed solar powered killing sheep. With ninja skills.

Why sheep are terrifying: 5

They dance to Olivia Newton John and know all the words from Grease.

Violence of the Lambs

Black Sheep, the movie.

The propaganda war has begun.

At the behest of some rich and powerful sheep, the studio have deliberately confused fact and fiction in this motion picture. My sources tell me that people are leaving cinemas laughing and unafraid of sheep.

Bad idea.

Five crew members were savagely attacked by zombified sheep that slipped into the sheep crowd scenes. Unfortunately, I'm unable to confirm this as my source has mysteriously disappeared. I fear the worst for him and his family.

Be prepared folks, the sheep are coming they're not playing nice..

Why sheep are terrifying: 4

They sneak into your room at night and try on your underwear while you're sleeping.

Why sheep are terrifying: 3

They are the masters of disguise and have infiltrated the corridors of power.

Why sheep are terrifying: 2

They stare at you with their beady little eyes and never blink.

Why sheep are terrifying: 1

They have a special switch that lets them glow in the dark.

The beginning

It seems like a lifetime ago, but I remember the moment clearly. The Girl, her eyes dark and soulless in the fading daylight, wrapped her arms around me and opened her heart.
"Sheep," she said. "They're terrifying."

Ever since that moment, when the fear in her voice chilled my nuts, I've dedicated my entire being to the study of sheep, their dark arts and their true nature. And now it's time for the world to learn the truth.

Mild mannered, fluffy walking balls of wool. Or sinister, scheming agents of sheepiness? Here, at the Terrifying Nature of Sheep, prepare to be enlightened.

Better bring some mint sauce..